Hypnotism

The Hypnotist

It was entertainment night at Shady Pines old people's home. Claude
the hypnotist exclaimed: 'I'm here to put you into a trance; I intend to
hypnotize each and every member of the audience.'

The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful
antique pocket watch from his coat 'I want you each to keep your eye on this
antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six
generations'.

He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly
chanting, 'Watch the watch, watch the watch, and watch the watch...'

The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light
gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the
swaying watch, until, suddenly, it slipped from the hypnotist's finger and
fell to the floor, shattering into a hundred pieces.


'SH*T' said the Hypnotist...

It took three days to clean up the old people's home

I went and saw a hypnotist the other night he had a group of males on the stage all hypnotised. "He was explaining his act whilst on the stage and telling everyone what was happening. But what happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life. He tripped off the stage and when he landed he said "F*** ME"
I know I will never remove that image from my mind.