Gary Parker

Sad article from Graham Cornes in the paper re ex Glenelg and SAFC player Gary Parker, a Sad Sad loss to see people being overcome by alcohol addiction like this. When I used to work on the Salvation Army soup run we used to serve a group of guys in Hutt Street, one of whom was an ex Sturt Footballer. It is such a shame that for some people they cant get themselves out of it after some tragic event takes place in their lives.

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Tragic toll of broken heart

By GRAHAM CORNES
November 07, 2009 12:00am

TO those of us who knew Gary Parker, the news of his death came as a horrible shock. He was, after all, only 53, younger than most us who played with him at Glenelg and South Adelaide in the late 1970s and early 80s.

The circumstances of his passing and the predicament of his final years moved us even more.

He was found slumped in a doorway in Port Adelaide.

The police said his death was not suspicious - they recognised him as a local who drank too much and wandered the streets of the Port in the shambolic manner of those who seek refuge in alcohol.

The probable cause of death was asphyxiation, but his close friends and family, maintain he died from a broken heart.

Gary Parker was a great guy; always the life of the party, always had a fantastic smile on his face. He was dynamic, funny and entertaining; just great to be around.

So big and striking, it was impossible to ignore him, and women were irresistibly drawn to him.

Of course, he liked a beer, but there was no indication alcohol would take such an insidious hold over him.

He grew up at Brighton, the second of three brothers in a sports-mad family. He loved his football and cricket and was equally adept at both. He barracked for Glenelg and idolised Sir Garfield Sobers, the great West Indian allrounder.

Indeed, in those endless games of backyard cricket with his brothers, Russell and Nialle, he always was "Sir Garfield Parker".

Ironically though, he was the spitting-image of Shane Warne, and, to the amusement of mates, often would wink at them as he signed autographs for adoring fans who were convinced he was the legendary Australian cricketer.

Parker, of course was a schoolboy star - in both sports. He dominated at Paringa Park Primary School, where latter day champions and team-mates Stephen Kernahan and Chris McDermott both attended, and won an academic scholarship to the exclusive Scotch College.

His four years at Scotch College ended traumatically when running to catch the train in his cadet uniform, he slipped in his hob-nail boots and fell between the platform and the departing train. Luckily, he escaped bruised, but shaken.

He finished his schooling at Brighton High, where he was a prefect, captained the First XI cricket team and starred in the footy team.

He went through the junior ranks at Glenelg, and won the reserves goalkicking, but couldn't displace the established stars in Glenelg's powerful forward structure. When the Victorian legend, John Nicholls, came to coach the Bays in 1977, he stated his policy that anyone who was 21 and over and hadn't broken into the league team was wasting his time and should seek opportunities elsewhere.

So, Parker and several of his mates moved to South Adelaide.

He played several league games under Haydn Bunton, but had the satisfaction in playing in a reserves premiership, ironically beating Glenelg. He played a few games for West Torrens before eventually moving to amateur football where he absolutely starred.

He played at West Lakes with our state Treasurer Kevin Foley, who mentioned him, albeit anonymously this week in his frank revelations about his own tussle with depression.

Eventually, Parker married and within 10 years had fathered five children - four sons and a daughter. His family was his life until, unexpectedly, his marriage disintegrated. That was a development that completely blind-sided him, and plunged him into an ever-deepening abyss of depression that no amount of alcohol could obliterate.

A teacher by profession, he worked for five years with former Glenelg team-mate Chris Hercock in the Education Department's Special Learning Centres for kids who suffer emotional and social upheaval.

That is a role that requires compassion, empathy and tolerance, and Hercock, who still is involved in that remarkable occupation, remembers him warmly: "He was intelligent, gregarious and enthusiastic. Everybody loved him: he was one of those guys who you could work with," he said.

But he never recovered from his marriage break-up and, despite a significant relationship with a new partner, he could not escape the downhill spiral of depression, alcohol, rehab, relapse; depression, alcohol, rehab, relapse; depression, etc. Until the end.

He was diagnosed with clinical depression, but in the macho manner of too many men, shunned the medication. His subsequent relationship faltered and he found himself on the streets. He wasn't penniless by any means, but he couldn't rent a flat and moved from hotel room to hotel room, not caring if he slept rough or not. But he never moved far from where his kids lived.

The experts told his family, after another bout of failed rehabilitation, alcoholics sometimes have to reach rock bottom before they can help themselves. How much lower can you go?

Gary Parker's funeral service was held yesterday. He leaves a father, grief-stricken that he has outlived his son; two brothers distraught with helplessness at his plight; five kids who can't understand or know how much their father loved them.

He also leaves old friends and teammates who wonder how on earth they could let one of their own take such a turn for the worse without doing something about it.

BeyondBlue 1300 224 636.

http://www.news.com.au/adelaidenow/story/0,22606,26315415-5012500,00.html

There was also a family man and footballer from the hills area who took his own life whilst suffering from depression. Very sad.

AN EXTREMLEY SAD STORY.
GET HELP IF YOU NEED IT PEOPLE. SOMEONE LOVES YOU.

Know this is going back a while but very sad story this one.
I worked with Gary for a while a couple of years ago, very friendly guy and struck me as being very humble about what he had achieved in footy.
When you mention his name to people who he had worked with they all speak very highly of how good he was at his job. Sadly as Cornsey mentioned in that article many people are probably left wondering..even now...how could they not help their mate.

MATT IN WA wrote:AN EXTREMLEY SAD STORY.
GET HELP IF YOU NEED IT PEOPLE. SOMEONE LOVES YOU.

yes....unfortunately though your best friend could have depression and you may not even know.....alot of times you dont find out untill too late....because people are usually embarrased or uncomfortable telling other people about how they are feeling......look at shane birss he had depression and he has come out of it a better person...... make sure if you need help get it dont be afraid to ask.....